Comment please - I was in HR and no one was willing to consider me as their friend

Hi friends, I would like to share with u one of my hardest experiences... I work as a HR - Executive in an Engg concern... I am handling this post only for the past 2 years but I have been serving the company for the past 3 years.. For a period of 1 year from the date of joining, I was performing the role of a secretary to my Chief Executive...At that point of time as per my job profile I had to coordinate with all the department members.. But after designating me as the HR I was isolated from all and given a separate cabin...

I am an extrovert person and like to make friends.. When I was a secretary I had a lot many friends.. But when I became the HR the no: of friends got reduced... Still, I had one true friend with whom I used to share all my personal and professional matters and the friend also proved true to me..I had only one friend in my entire office since I was in HR and no one was willing to consider me as their friend as was also least bothered since I felt that, that one true friend was sufficient for my life. Recently he got engaged 2 to 3 days back and just a day before ie yesterday my true friend called me up and told me that he would not be speaking to me and that would be his last call since his fiance told me... I was just shocked and became 2 emotional but did not show anything...

Friends, I know that this is nothing related to the forum.. But since I felt very lonely and found no one to share... I have shared it with you.
I just want to know one thing, dear friends... Are you guys like this? Up to my knowledge, I have only seen gals like this...
Kindly apologise for wasting ur precious time.

Dear Sowmya,

Sorry to hear about ur situation.. but my only suggestion is just forget about that friend and continue ur work...i know it is hard to do so...but don't get emotionally stuck with one person... if u do so, only ur life may get spoiled of thinking about ur friend...there are lot more people in this world who value real friendship... don't waste ur time for the person who thinks it is a waste spending time for u....though my words sound harsh, take it as a suggestion from a new friend dear...i'm one of the victim who faced the same situation in my life...so do not worry..go ahead with ur goals...be cheerful... :)

not all guys are like your friend, it is not the problem with your friend, it is the problem with the society...our Indian culture doesn't accept a friendship between a guy and a girl...until we are friends it doesnt matter, but when it comes to marital relationship, guys and girls become tooooooo possessive and the problem arises...so this happens in everybody's life... don't think that only ur friend had behaved like this...all the married people face this kind of problem...as i already told u..forget about the past and be more initiative in achieving ur goals... never get emotionally stuck with people...

Don’t let someone become a priority in u r life….whn u r just an option in their life….Relationships work best whn thy are balanced....

regards,

Maria Merlin

soumya, maria has correctly put that in by saying that realtionships work best when they are balanced but the problem with us is that when we get to know the truth and reality it is too late.
but you dont worry. even i have faced this problem in recent past and my advise over this matter is that try not to indulge too much before judging the perosn because it is going to harm you than any body else.
do not get dishearten dear. that which is not with u was not meant for you.

Thanks a lot Maria & Pinki... :) What u have said is really true.. Y to waste our precious time for a person who does not know the value of friendship..

hai,
friendship and official work dont mingle both,the person u think be true in ur words itself ,think that person situation also,onething my opinion once we understand each other then any such situation will never separate us, that is friendship ,but u did u r work effectively ,u get more true friends
by praveen

Hi Praveen
U have asked me to understand his situation.. But I dont think that his situation is that bad enough to put an end to his friendship... According to me everything was in his hand.. If he would have respected friendship, he would have tried to explain this things to his better half in a calm and composed manner when things would have settled down and not when things have just started...I dont blame his better half because anyone in her position would have done the same what she has done... But it was the duty of my friend to explain her....
I just understood onething that if the friend wanted to give such importance to his better half that he would anything for her like what he has done now then he would have not had any friendship with gals... Y did he do so when he was sure that this would occur in future.
Sowmya

hai ,
as per ur thought if he try he continue the friendship,but once again u think the better half is not understand him as u understand because they starts life now only,so for him it a tough situation,u wait dont disturb him,u carry on u r work effectively,if the friendship is true definitely come back ,otherwise u pray for his success because u will be the only true friend to him,if he continue or discontinue for us not possible to forget thats true friendship
by praveen

Sowmya,
Pinki, Praveen and Siva are correct. As i already told u, don't waste your time and energy in this issue. It is always better to maintain some distance. just place yourself in your friend's situation. If your hubby says to stop talking to your friend, what will u do??? there are so many things which are practically not possible.. so just ignore these things and concentrate more on career.... We girls are born to shine in this world not to sit and cry for small reasons... :)
be cheerful and more bold to face this challenging world dear...
regards,
Maria Merlin

dear sowmya
i think that person was impressed with your behavior and character and he would have kept some thing in his mind about you suddenly because of you are engaged he is moving away from you it is good for you also i think but it is natural that one will attracted if the closeness and sharing of feelings i have seen many cases like this be happy